Beyond the Reformer

Burnout, Boundaries and Building a Career That Lasts as a Pilates Teacher with Audrey O'Connor

• Nic Lenny

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0:00 | 1:10:07

"I cannot be of service to other people if I cannot be of service to myself."

You left the corporate world for a reason. But somehow you're exhausted, resentful, and wondering why this passion-driven career feels just as relentless as the one you walked away from.

Nic is joined by Audrey O'Connor - former quantity surveyor, Pilates teacher, sound healer, and wellness educator who now works with global brands like Google. Back for her second appearance, Audrey digs into what burnout actually looks like for Pilates teachers - not just tiredness, but resentment, physical symptoms, and the trap of performing busyness as a badge of honour.

They get practical on morning rituals, finances, multiple revenue streams, and valuing your time before resentment does it for you. Audrey also brings in something unexpected: astrology and human design as tools for understanding why you show up the way you do - and why changing your mind is not the same as being flaky.

Whether you're in the thick of burnout or starting to feel the edges of it, there's something here for you.


Timestamps

01:13 What burnout actually is - beyond just being tired

03:50 Busyness as a badge of honour and how to recognise the patterns

07:52 Vision, values, and the Pilates industry comparison trap

09:02 How performance and money are connected to burnout

11:12 Taking care of your body when teaching is your job

13:15 Switching off on holiday (and why content creation doesn't count as rest)

17:05 Rituals, routines and habit stacking

23:37 Finding a ritual practice that fits your life

26:07 Astrology and human design as tools for self-understanding

31:34 Why Pilates teachers are particularly prone to burnout

32:21 Being of service vs. sacrificing yourself

34:15 Burnout, undervaluing, and our complicated relationship with money

56:58 Mindset, self-worth, and why opportunities arrive when you stop chasing them

58:44 If you're overwhelmed right now - start here


If this episode resonated, share it with someone in the industry who needs to hear it. And make sure you're following along so you don't miss what's coming next.


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Connect with Audrey:

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SPEAKER_01

Coming up on today's episode of Beyond the Reformer burnout. It's one of those phrases I think people throw around when they're a bit tired. But what does it really mean?

SPEAKER_00

It can show up as resentment a lot of the time, where you're getting tired, you're getting fatigued, and then you're like blaming everybody else but yourself.

SPEAKER_01

Busyness is almost a bit of a badge of honour, and it shouldn't be. This week on Beyond the Reformer, I'm joined by Audrey O'Connor, a Pilates teacher, a wellness expert, and today we are going to do a deep dive on the topic of burnout as Pilates teachers. So strap in, sit down with a cup of tea, and let's look at how we can thrive in this industry and not drown under the weight of the work that we are doing. I am a Pilates teacher, a studio owner, and educator, and your host for these conversations. This week we have brought back Audrey O'Connor. Audrey O'Connor was one of the very first episodes we did, and we discussed her story of Pilates, becoming a Pilates teacher from the corporate world. Now she works with corporate giants like Google on their well-being. And recently I did a solo episode where I talked about my own feeling of burnout at the moment, and I had so many messages from so many of you saying that you felt the same and that we'd love to explore a bit more how we could do better. So I thought of no better woman to bring on than Audrey because she has lived and breathed this. She's now very focused on sound healing, but also worked with big corporates on their well-being. She's so used to busy people and the demands that this work puts on us. So I thought this would be a great opportunity for us to sit down and this week maybe do something that helps to refill our cup. So before we get going, I would be so grateful if you could like, subscribe, follow wherever you're listening or watching to this, we're on YouTube or on Spotify video. We are growing enormously and I appreciate you all so much for doing that and for also sharing on socials and telling your friends about it. So thank you so much. But let's today get into our conversation so that we can all do better with the topic of burnout. Audrey, what a delight it is to have you on the podcast again. You're here for the second time.

SPEAKER_00

Yes, how are you, Nick? I am so excited about this morning. And even I went for a walk and I was just thinking about the episode, and I was like, God, there's so much that's changed since the last time I was talking to you. And oh, I just think it's gonna be a really exciting chat.

SPEAKER_01

Well, if you're interested in hearing Audrey's story, you were one of the first guests we had on. I was so grateful when nobody knew who I was, and you were like, Yeah, I'll come on. So, you know, your story is you left the corporate world, you had burnout yourself, and you kind of got into Pilates, you're now a sound healer, you do a lot of wellness work with big corporate giants like Google, for example. And I recently did a solo episode where I touched upon a little bit like my own feelings of burnout at the moment. And I think so many people commented in and said that they were feeling similar. And I kind of said, I don't have the answers, I'm not sure. What do you think? And so many people were like, Well, you know, we'd love to explore more. And I thought, I know somebody who we could have a chat with about this, and it's you because ever since you know we met on a course years ago, we were sort of like Instagram friends, but not real friends. And then I feel like since we did that episode, we message each other a lot, and you are my go-to person when things are a bit tough. So I thought today we would explore the topic of burnout, which you can hear in lots of podcasts and things out there. But you come from our world, you know, you know what it's like to be a Pilates teacher. And I think today we should talk about the specific challenges around that. So to begin, Audrey, I thought, you know, what is burnout? It's one of those phrases I think people throw around when they're a bit tired. But what does it really mean?

SPEAKER_00

I think it's so funny how we actually, you're right, our friendship has evolved since that because when you can see yourself in other people, I can see myself in you, and you can see yourself in me, there's that connection. So it's like we're not different, we're actually on the same level. It's just something you forget about all the time when you're a teacher. You're like, I'm on this level, people are here, they're coming to me, we're all different when we're actually all the same, we're just wearing different masks. The thing about burnout, I think, that comes into the people don't really talk about a lot is there can be a lot of like burnout can be exhausting, but it feels like chronic fatigue. Um, you can sleep, you're like, oh my god, at the weekend I'm gonna have a lion on Sunday. It does not make a difference. Your sleep debt does not make a difference. You can go for a week where you're like, I'll get a quick fix, I'll do some smoothies every morning. I was making beetroot smoothies in the morning, this kind of crazy stuff, and it can show up as resentment a lot of the time, where you're getting tired, you're getting fatigued, and then you're like blaming everybody else but yourself for the situation you're in. Because I was definitely in there as like, oh my god, this is a studio's fault, this is society's fault, this is my industry's fault, nobody can understand me. I'm telling everybody how busy I am. I will admit I was that person that would go on Instagram and be like, eight classes done today, so tired, busy woman, hashtag fitfan. Like I did that stuff, and it's all part of the growth, it's all part of the lesson. But burnout for me showed up as irritability, not being present. I had pelvic floor issues, ironic because I was a Pilates teacher, but I was also a Pilates teacher who was sucking in my tummy all the time while I was teaching because I thought that's what I needed to do, even though I really knew deep down I wasn't meant to do that. I was overperforming, trying to do every single job, trying to be a social media manager, trying to be a teacher, trying to uh upskill, uh trying to be present for my friends. And I found that I was just burning out and actually not able to commit to anything fully, if that makes sense.

SPEAKER_01

I think that's and busyness is almost a bit of a badge of honour, and it shouldn't be. But people will say to me all the time, oh my god, Nick, I don't know how you do or you do. I've just got this, and you've got three studios and you've got this. And I'm like, I wouldn't recommend it in some ways. Yeah, you know, truthfully. And where I kind of got to and what I shared on my episode was we often we're the people, I mean, I hear myself giving advice. It's really good advice, Audrey, but sometimes we struggle to take it ourselves. So if someone is listening in and they're starting to recognise some of these patterns in themselves, how do we start to tackle this? Because what we don't need is something else on our already very busy to-do list.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, you have to strip it back to your who you are, your identity, what you're doing, and what's your why in a really simple way. So for me, all the sleep in the world wasn't going to make a difference. Changing jobs wasn't gonna make a difference. Oh, it might have made it some of a difference someplace with my schedule and stuff like that. Um, I really had to remember that when I took on the because I used to be a quantity surveyor, so that wasn't really my identity, like in the form of like I went to work, I could leave work at six o'clock, maybe, but it wasn't like my full identity, and my identity and my job are fully intertwined when I was a PLAD as instructor because I am my brand. And another word brand is like, so like it sounds very like ugh, but it's it's true. You are you're representing yourself. So if I was a quantity to rare, I was representing my company, so that's different. So the box stops at you, you're involved with your messaging who you are and your why. So if you don't know who you are and what your why is, then that can be draining and that leads to resentment, and it means that where you're thinking about validation comes into it. So if I don't know who I am, I am looking for validation from everybody else but myself. And I'm not saying that now, like I figure this out and I'm you know God's gift, you know, it's not bad. I just had to do a lot of work on myself and figure out what am I doing, who am I doing it for? Is it for a long-term fix or is it for a long-term short-term fix or a long-term result? So I would say the best thing to do is literally sit down and have a chat with yourself. Like you would do an inventory on your accounts. Like for me, I was like, okay, say I was in my 20s when I was doing Pilates, late 20s, like late, very late 20s was when I started, and I was in Pilates for a good chunk of my 30s. When I got into it, my why was very clear. I was like, I want to help people that have been through what I've been through. I want to work as a Pilates instructor who can help people rehabilitate their bodies on people to feel good. It was all this. Then I got into the industry, the intention changed. I was like, I have to pack out full classes, I have to show everyone, I'm the best teacher in the studio, and then everybody be like, oh my god, she's number one. I also was like, I have to be fit as a fiddle, I have to look the part. Then I was also like, oh my god, there's all these Pilates boxes. There's contemporary, there's traditional, there's a Pilates princess, there's Stot. Like for me, I was like, I have to fit into this certain um box. And then there's the social side of things. All of a sudden, something that never really come I came into my head before was like, oh, there's like events I could go to now. Oh, like you know, Lululemon are in town. I wonder if I get invited to this thing. Something that I never crossed my mind before. But if I was excluded, then I was like, oh, I'm not I'm not cool enough. Oh, I'm not obviously doing enough. I need to project more online, I need to show up more. So I would go to class and then be doing hours of work online to get validation from everybody else but myself, and I had forgotten what my why was, if that makes sense, and I had to still keep on going back to it and going back to it and going back to it, because you can get distracted a lot.

SPEAKER_01

I love that you shared that because on our teacher trainings, we make people do an exercise where they write their own vision and values and what are the things that are important to you, and therefore will help shape you as a teacher, and will also help, you know, maybe help you choose if you've got the if you've got the opportunity to choose what studios you resonate with. Because of course that's part of it, isn't it? What you share though goes deeper and it really resonates, and I'm sure it will resonate with lots of people listening as well. Around maybe we get into this work and we think it's this idyllic kind of well-being life, but it's still an industry and there's still hierarchy and there's still opportunities, and I'm sure lots of people have felt, well, why am I not number one in my studio? Or why am I only getting this many views on social? Why am I not a Lululemon ambassador? And this other person is, and you can get into that same mindset that we've chatted in your episode about that we had in the corporate world, and that's interesting, isn't it? Because we kind of left it for that reason, but it's still an industry, so there's still those kind of conversations and challenges still happen.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, and your performance is linked to yourself, obviously, but it's also linked to money. If you are the top instructor, you are getting paid more like any other job, or well, not every other job, but like so you kind of set these figures in your head of what your earnings could be. And then when it's not, you blame yourself, which is not right either, you know, and there's a lot of different factors going on, but you're like, oh, this reflects badly on me. You are in group staff meetings, every studio has to have staff meetings, everybody's getting on, but there's that fear like, oh my god, am I doing okay? When you're doing okay, you feel it because there's an element of sales in it as well. And then the better you are, the more demand there is for you. So it it's it's very layered. So you have to come back to your why all the time, and your why might change, and that's okay. There's often this flakiness associated with changing your mind, or you know, maybe going, I don't, I maybe I don't want to be teaching a group class anymore. Maybe I actually really like doing one-to-ones, but I feel guilty because I've had these clients for about the past five years, and then if I leave them, I feel like I'm being flaky, or and all this stuff. When I remember during my time, I was like, 'Oh, I'm really enjoying one-to-ones,' but I better keep sticking to my seven, my eight, my nine o'clock class, and then do my one-to-ones afterwards because I don't want to disappoint people. There's all this stuff that surrounds this industry and performance. Are you gonna disappoint people? It's okay to disappoint people from time to time. There's a lot of stuff that comes from childhood that comes back to your identity, comes back to your relationship with yourself and your relationship with the money as well.

SPEAKER_01

Well, I think that you know that if your why is I don't know, I want to help people, this practice made me feel so good, I want to do that for other people. That's quite a common solid why. How do you revisit that when you find yourself being pulled into comparison and you realize that's not making you feel good? Like how, you know, how do you say, Well, I didn't I didn't go into this to be a Lululemon ambassador as the example. I went into this to help people, I'm helping people, I'm busy, I'm you know, how do you truly let that calm that feeling down?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, you have to like for me, I wish I was in therapy or did therapy around the time I was being a platters instructor, but also that's an ex that's an expensive, it's expensive as well. For me, having good relationships with friends of mine who are peers, but also maintaining friendships that were not involved in the industry is really important. Being able to switch off and have conversations that were not about what I was doing, and understanding what excites me and what drives me outside of my work, because it's all related. Taking care of my body was really important as well. At the time, I was like doing like one-to-one training with a guy who was strength training because I had to look after my health and I knew it was deteriorating. Because if you're teaching six or seven classes a day, you're hopping on a reformer, you're hopping off, you're doing your body one-sided work constantly. One-sided work, your voice is going down, and then you wonder why like every five weeks you've got a chest infection, you're wondering why you're run down. Then you're inside in like the health food shop buying, you know, liquid gold and inhaling it, you know, it's that kind of cycle. Just asking myself, oh, okay, so I have holidays for two weeks. Why am I running away to somewhere like really probably expensive, far away to rest when I actually could spend that time actually having a week at home and just organizing my life in the most basic way? And that's the kind of stuff that people forget. I think when you're in this kind of burnout phase or when you're overstretched, you're like, I need a holiday. What you need is consistency and taking care of your side of the street. So for me, I remember doing small things like when I had a week off, I was like off offline, I was not on my things because what can happen is, and I don't mind sharing it. Hope this is not a clip, but I remember like being when I was an instructor and I was working really hard, and then I'd go on holidays, and I would go, oh my god, that's a really cool view. Maybe I could do like a plank in front of that and get some content while I'm on holidays and then upload like I I if you can't cringe at yourself, your jeez, you know what I mean? But still do that, yeah. And because it's not then switching off, isn't it? No, I felt like I always had to be on. Everything was an opportunity, everything was work-related. And like that's okay to admit that, it's not shameful, but I did not that's what that's when my my balancing was was not there, and it was everything was overlapping. So for me, when I caught myself doing that, I was like, What are you doing? Everything everywhere you're going, you're thinking about work, or how could this be work related, or how could this boost when I really wanted to just enjoy my time and go for a walk and and read a book. So what I started doing was like on my weeks off, just organizing my house, cleaning out my drawers, cleaning out those places in the kitchen, just letting my mind get lost in just that kind of method of just decluttering because when you declutter your own internal environment and the space you live in, everything starts changing, and then I was like, okay, this is getting easier. Then I was like having chats with my accountant. Obviously, I'm quantity surveyor, so finances comes into my head quite a lot. Like, so working with budgeting, like, am I actually getting paid for the hours I'm doing? Does this make sense? Could I be using my time somewhere else? And then also what I did was social media was a big one because I feel like I was kind of in the early days of social media, so we didn't really know what it looked like. There was no blueprint. So there is an innocence that comes with that and naivety, I think. So I had to be like, Well, if I'm gonna be doing creating content, I will do it on Thursday from four to six. It's not creeping into every day or just hopping online because if you hop online for five minutes, it turns into 25. You could be on Canva editing a corner of a picture for 20 minutes.

SPEAKER_01

I had Leslie Logan on the show, and she shared how she's carved up, you know, these very set blocks of time, and I think that's a really great place to be. In our teacher training, we have an energy module and we talk about the energy of our work, both the energy that we're creating in class. We also talk about how, you know, whether you mean to or not, you bring that energy into the class. And what are you doing to refill your cup? And if we think about Pilates, Joseph Pilates was all about the balance of work, recreation, and life, you know, and all those things. He was talking about this when burnout wasn't such a huge issue. And I guess again, Rayal Azakovic from Basi was talking about this. You know, if you're a teacher, you need to live and breathe this work, you need to be that. You don't expect to, I don't know, go and do a Buddhist meditation training, and you don't expect the monk to not be living and breathing this work. You know, you kind of expect them to do that. And to your point, how are we looking after our bodies? How are we looking after ourselves? And so one of the tasks I get people to do is to write a list of what refills your cup, because everyone's different. And some, you know, some people write some really interesting things in those homework, and some of them are the ones you'd expect, like walks in nature. And this one woman said, I love my gua sha at night. Like that's my, it's like a ritual that I have. And I thought that's amazing, actually, just to think of your own, you know, something that fits into your routine already, but that you make it present. She said, I just stay present in those two minutes, and I kind of have a little routine. And I love tips like that that are you can fit them within your life already, to practice the art of presence or practice the art of coming back to yourself, to have some boundaries around I'm gonna turn my email off when I go on holiday, I'm not gonna post any social media. You know, it's it's those things, isn't it? And I guess that's because I think sometimes boundaries can feel a little like I'm saying no. Yeah. And I know that a lot of people ask me, what do you mean by boundaries?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, and you're so right. Like I listen to this guy called Rye X all the time, he's an amazing musician. He's not like sitting at home looking at his piano and his guitar for hours, going, Come on, man, let's get this going. He's out in nature, he's in Australia the whole time, he's at the beach, he hangs out with dancers, he hangs out with other creative people, he's constantly filling his cup because otherwise it feels stagnant. Like if you're a historian and you teach history in a in a in a college, and you're not looking up like history, you're not watching documentaries, you're not going to sacred sites, your energy is going to get so stagnant. And that's what happens. You see, sometimes I had a lecture years ago, and I remember he was just so bored of his own voice, and I remember being him being like, Did you enjoy that lecture? And I was like, Oh my god, you're asking me, Did I enjoy your lecture? Whoa! But I was thinking, God, he's actually at the end of his tether and he's not getting any creative outlets here, and he's burning out himself. Yeah, this is the big stuff. Like, you have to have your rituals, routines. Like, obviously, because of what I do, rituals and routines are everything to me. So I'm very strict. I've always been very strict with myself anyway, and maybe it's not always a good thing, but when it comes to my rituals and routines, I have to be, otherwise, I get super distracted. So, just actually on a point before I even talk about rituals, you mentioned it there about like going on holidays and not being on social media. There's something I've done which has been a game changer for me, and I don't know if you do the same thing. I would often maybe do a session, do a workshop, and then afterwards, maybe people would be like, Oh, that was really enjoyable, I really liked it, and then I would be like posting online or maybe answering messages, or sometimes people would say to me, Oh, something came up for me during this. Can I book a one-to-one? Whatever it was, and I would get in the car and I kind of answered on the fly, or else I'd pull over and be like, Oh, it's been 10 minutes. I do not do that anymore. There's only a certain time where I will answer messages and emails when I'm locked in, and I give people that decency as well because it's not fair. I wouldn't love if my teacher was messaging me on the fly and was thinking about 10 million things while she's doing her shopping in Tesco. So I only do that, so like you'll even know when we message each other and you do the same. If I'm messaging you, I've sat down, I've thought about it, I'm sitting down, I'm not giving you a half answer, if that makes sense, and I think that's really important. So we'll say for me now today, there's a bit of there's a time in my day where I get like a slump, and that's usually around three o'clock. So three to four is when I'm sitting down with the messages, DMs, or emails, and that's okay. And maybe it's not an instant answer, but that's how I work, and it's better because I'm giving myself fully. But uh totally got sidetracked there. Rituals. My rituals are everything. So uh I'm an early riser, and I wasn't always an early riser. So, like, and I think most teenagers aren't early risers either. But I'm very strict with myself. So I, what's her name? Mel Robbins is always talking about this. Now I'm not a big Mel Robbins girly, but she has little nuggets of wisdom in there. But I get up in the morning, my alarm goes off. That's it. I get up. I don't think about it. I'm not like, oh my God, are you tired, Audrey? Do you want to roll over? It's not like that. I just get up. I have two cats, so they're like feed me. So I get up at six and I'm downstairs. Phone is not with me, and that's okay. And then I go downstairs, I have to have my morning ritual. I have to have my morning meditation. I'll either do a meditation or a Reiki practice in the morning or both. And that's for a 10-minute block. And if I usually start with 10 minutes, as they say, it goes a little bit longer. I habit stack. So I can't have my coffee until I do my meditation. I can't do my meditation unless I've had my water and lemon. So I do all these three things together. So the cats are fed first and then I do the three things together. That's my non-negotiable if I'm in a different country. If I'm anywhere, I haven't, even if there's really serious stuff going on at home, that's probably the time I need to be doing the most. So I haven't stopped that in I'd say four, four years, five years. Uh, even if I'm on holidays, I'll do it. And that keeps me on straightened hour because I cannot be of service to other people if I cannot be of service to myself. And then I'll either go for a walk. As you're you were saying there earlier, lymphatic drainage is huge for me. It's amazing. I do lymphatic drainage probably every second day. I do a little 10-minute routine with this girl online called The Moments. Um, she's on YouTube. Oh my gosh, she's amazing. Free content, she's incredible. It's called the Moments. She has 10-minute lymphatic drainage. I'll probably do that. I do it in bed as well if I've had a busy day. Things that are ritual but that are not that obvious. If I come home from work, I change my clothes. I can often be in the same outfit and then bring in the same energy, so I'll often change my clothes. If I've had because I obviously work with a lot of um emotional the emotional body a lot with people when I'm doing healing sessions, if I have them at night time, well not at nighttime, like not at midnight, but at like eight o'clock, nine o'clock, there's not a chance that I'll get home and fall straight asleep. So I'll have a shower before I go to bed, feel the energy releasing and just kind of protecting my own energy and saying, okay, the day is ended. You've done you've done your work, go to sleep, if that makes sense.

SPEAKER_01

When I go away very rarely on a retreat, and I am the space is held for me. I can, you know, really dip into like drop in heavy to meditation and rituals, and I come home and I think, right, I'm gonna have, you know, the morning's so important, isn't it? And then you come home, you've got two small kids, you've got the dog, you got whatever, right? And this is the reality of life. Okay, so then I say to myself, right, well, I can't do it then, but I'm gonna do it the moment I arrive into my office, and I do it for like two days, and then I don't do it anymore. But I will have other rituals like the shower in the evening and the changing of clothes and you know, intentions and things like that. But I do think that regular meditation piece, or I mean, for those of you listening, Audrey has this amazing sound healing platform that I tell everybody about. You know, I haven't shared this with you. I start all my meetings with one of your 10 or 15 minute ones to ground the energy, and then everyone's like, Who is this? I need to sign up to this because it's sound meditation, Reiki, breathwork practices, it's so good. But my point is how can someone like me find a way to make that a regular practice? I'm not sure it can be every day, but then if it's not every day, it almost becomes hard to remember when you're supposed to do it. I don't know. This is hard for me.

SPEAKER_00

Yes, and I get that a hundred percent, because not everybody is we're all wired differently. And some people like and I talk about astrology a lot, some people are fixed signs, some people are not. Like, I'm a fixed sign, so I crave routine. I'm married to a Virgo who's not a fixed sign, so he loves change all the time. So people are different, so you never have to put yourself into a box of like I have to do this every day. So if you're waking up in the morning, you're like, I have 10 minutes, I need to check in on myself. A some people love journaling in the morning. I'm actually not very good at journaling in the morning, I'll admit that. I my brain doesn't work like that, and then it becomes a task, and then I get frustrated with myself. So the main thing is find a way to check in with yourself first thing in the morning, whether that is like I saw a friend of mine yesterday and I was like, Oh, that's beautiful. She was wrapped up in a blanket, sitting in a just a normal back garden with her blanket around her, looking up at the sun. I was like, five minutes, amazing. Because uh, I'm very strict. Like if I don't have if I have a busy morning ahead, I'm getting up earlier. I have a book that changed my life and I found it really helpful. It's a Robin Shoremak book. Um it wasn't the 5am club, but give me one second, I'm gonna get the name of it, but it was all about how you're the how you work your work week. If I can get the name of it, I'll send it on to you because it's really helpful. But that changed everything because I used to make a lot of excuses for myself, and what it is about is that you have to honour yourself. So the more I was in burnout, the more I didn't want to face myself because a lot of the things that I had been burnt out from was from childhood, was from myself, was from my identity, and that starts coming up when you're in your 30s, when you're in 40s, when you're in your 20s, you're kind of a little bit oblivious to a lot of the stuff because you're just in that kind of go-go-go mode, but then you can't really escape it when you're in your 30s or 40s. So the thing of every day sitting down and going in the morning, like I'm not every morning going like Audrey, tell me how you're feeling, but I am like, How's my heart rate this morning? Am I tired? Am I fatigued? I will honestly say, like, when I was in my 20s, I didn't know my cycles, I didn't know, you know, what kind of phase I was in. I couldn't have told I would be like, Oh my god, I'm so cranky today, and then I'm like, Oh, my period is tomorrow. That's how uh separated I was from my body and what I was doing, if that makes sense. Like get getting my period was like a surprise, and like, oh cool, it's here today. Was that four weeks ago? And that's bonkers.

SPEAKER_01

I hear you talk, you know, about astrology, about your signs, about the moon. How did you get to understand that? And did that help you understand yourself more?

SPEAKER_00

Oh, yeah, a hundred percent. There's something called human design, which I do a lot of work in and I'm trained in, and that's amazing. And that's another that could be a whole episode in itself. It's another kind of part, uh it's another like little leg hanging off astrology. But astrology for me has been very helpful because when you understand your sun sign, which is who you are at your core, your identity, how you shine your light in the world, if you understand what that is, then you understand what your moon sign is, which is your emotional body, and then you understand what your rising sign is, is how you how you present to the world, you learn a lot about yourself because people always only just hear about star signs. Your rising sign is really important. If you want to find out your rising sign, you have to find out the time you were born. So ask somebody who knows that, and then once you have that, you can understand yourself a little bit better. So, say if you're a there's different signs, so there's 12 signs in the in the zodiac, and then they're broken into earth, uh, water, so like uh air, earth, water, and fire. So if you can understand, that's quite interesting. So if you're a fire sign, so um, think about Leo, think about Aries, we can we can get a little bit heated when we want to, we can be a little bit reactive, we're very we get things done if that makes sense. Um, and we can often bypass the emotional body because we're busy, we're doing all the time. If you have a water sign, so your water signs could be the Pisces, the Cancers, water represents the emotional body, so you know that you're a little bit more attuned to sensitivities and more empathic, not saying Leo's not empathic, but you're more you could you could cry um and and allow that to happen and be like this is normal for me, and that's a really good thing, and that's why people often gravitate towards water signs. I'm not a water sign, but it's interesting if you are a water sign and you're listening to this podcast and you're like, Oh, I am, a lot of times people can offload on you because you are very attuned to sensitivities, you're very attuned to the emotional body, and you actually might bypass yourself a lot, so you might take on a lot of other people's stuff and not your own. If you're a grounded, um, earthy sign, like a Virgo, like a Capricorn, you might feel a lot of pressure on yourself to be grounded all the time, to hold space, to kind of be in that, and I don't like differentiating between masculine and feminine, but feeling like I have to hold everything together, and then you could be an air sign, uh, which we're talking like the Geminis of the world, who else? Libras. Um I'm a Libra. Yeah, they can be often uh craving that balance, but finding it hard because they're in the subconscious a lot of time, so a lot of the time the what's going on in the head is not being shown outwardly, so you could be taking in three different like you could be in a situation and taking in three different energies at the one time and noticing everything, but not showing it on your face, and then you're holding that in. And I have a lot of air signs in me. So what used to happen to me was I would be taking in and everything in, I didn't want to show my emotion, so I'd hold it in my pelvis, which is and in my gut. So if you are that kind of person, you kind of understand yourself a bit better. So for me, I was like, Oh my god, I have a lot of air, and I'm a Scorpio rising. So I was like, I'm not letting anybody see what's going on in the background. I would hold everything in, then I'm like, Oh, I'll figure this out when I get home later on, then I get home later on.

SPEAKER_01

And I hear the rising signs, how you can find that out online, can't you? And then what does that mean? Because I always hear this is quite an important part of you.

SPEAKER_00

It's huge, it's how you perform in the world, it's how you show and I was actually on a podcast last week, which is pretty random, talking about the Free Housewives of Beverly Hills and how their rising signs are important because they're on reality TV, so there is an element of yeah, they have this sun sign at their core, but they're also thinking about how am I performing here in front of everybody. And when you're a Pilates instructor, when you're a sound here like me, when you're doing anything, there is a level of performance. Like, I'm not gonna go and teach a class in my normal voice, I have to project my voice. There is an image that you want to present, so when you understand that, oh my god, if I am a Leo rising, I am really trying to present, not trying, I am presenting as this light. I have to be on all the time. It's all about beauty, aesthetics, not saying everything a person's like that. It's just like this, just an example. If you are a Scorpio rising, I'm a Scorpio rising, sometimes I can feel myself not letting people in. So I present like everything's fine, do my class, let's go, go, go, go, go. And then I'm having a coffee after class, and I'm like, whoa, there's a lot going on here, but I can't show anything. And then you could so it does present to the teacher. So if you do understand, oh my gosh, I'm a Capricorn rising and I'm presenting very serious, like I have to have everything together. I am this, you know, really strict person when you're not allowing yourself to show the other sides of yourself because you feel that obligation almost. And this is just say, you know, that's not everybody, so this is this, and like, oh my god, I'm not like this. It's just examples, but it's traits, isn't it?

SPEAKER_01

I like I think like some of this stuff's just really interesting to explore and see if that helps enlighten you a little bit to where some of this is coming. I wanted to ask you do you feel like Pilates teachers have a challenge with burnout in that you you're right, that absolutely teaching is a performance. We're also often here because we love helping people, and then we can maybe pick up, you know, people's energies, and we feel you mentioned it earlier as well about you feel so compelled. Well, I must teach, I'm supposed to have this day off, but I promised I'd see this person. Do you see that? Do you see that Pilates teachers and anyone in this kind of profession, yoga teachers, sound healers, that we are a little prone to getting burnout because of the work that we do?

SPEAKER_00

Yes, 100%. And there is this massive divide between being of service and then like sacrificing yourself in the process, bypassing all your needs. Because, and I think a lot of that comes from childhood as well, because I'm I'm not saying everybody, but a lot. For me, when I was younger growing up in the 80s in Ireland, um, you were meant to be a good girl, you were played along. The more selfless that you were, the more you didn't speak up. A lot of my identity was like be humble, um, be grateful, be thankful, be lucky you get that good job now for yourself, and you be thankful, you hold on to that job. And if you are being selfless, that's the best thing you can do. If you are helping people, you don't look for anything in return. And you shouldn't look for anything in return, obviously being of service. But where does it get to the point where you're actually like over-delivering and overperforming? So for me, like I would never have really spoken up, I wouldn't have thought that my needs matter that much. And I know a lot of people that are like this. So then when I was a wavy working somewhere for a couple of years, and I'm like, I think I actually am really performing really well, and I think I could do with a bit of a raise here, and inflation's happened and rent's gone up, but I can't ask for this because I'm uh being greedy, because I'm working in an industry which is all about taking care of people. Um, I can't take care of myself if my bank balance isn't where I needed to be. Um, I felt icky talking about money. I was like, this is disgusting. You know, if you're someone who grew up in different households where like maybe you didn't talk about money, maybe you were told things like, Oh, look at your man down the road these loads of money, he is he's so vulgar. It was often taken with be happy with what you've got, and also money um has its narrative around it, like, oh, I'm not good at money, I hear this all the time. That's just an excuse. You can you can you can figure it out.

SPEAKER_01

Do you think that burnout and overworking can come from a feeling of being undervalued and underpaid as a teacher? And how might we address our beliefs around money in this profession?

SPEAKER_00

Well, I actually do a lot of work around money, and I am maybe it was a blessing in a way. Can you remind me that second bit in a second so I probably forget it because it's a good one? I was lucky that I trained in the States, so I trained in California, which is the well, I trained in London as well in Ireland, but like in California is different. I find American mindset is like the world is your oyster, it's like you the the money is is is so expansive here. You can earn as much as you like, the you know, charge, but you know, your value is everything you're told like you can be the best be. Whereas I was always kind of thought more like through society, you know, you're you keep the head down and you you be thankful and you hold on to that job. So I had no boundaries whatsoever. So boundaries are very important. It starts from day one. Like if you're going, if you're I see it a little bit challenging, if you're someone like me who'd move from construction, did my Pilates teacher training. I just I originally did with Stot and then I moved to Polestar. I was like, oh my gosh, I want to get a job. I had no links, so when I did interviews with studios, I was like, oh my god, please pick me, please pick me. So it was more about them choosing me instead of me thinking, is this a good fit? So there is responsibility I had to put on myself there. I hadn't really thought about what I would like to get paid. I had maybe the minimum I'd want to get paid. I hadn't really thought about this, and I hadn't really thought about a long-term strategy. So all I thought was I will get paid by my class and then I would get my salary. So when I went for interviews, I didn't really ask the right questions and I just leaped into it. And then what can happen is you say yes, you're like, I'm so grateful. When's my start date? Here's my insurance, here's my insurance, and then you're in it, and then you're like, Oh, the math's not math thing here, I'm really overworked. And then what happens is you start getting resentful, and you're like, Oh, this studio is and like all studios are different, not all of them are the same. Um, and I've worked for loads of different places, you know. I'm just saying broadly, you know, you can think, oh, I'm working way too hard, they're making so much money, I'm not making enough. All this stuff can come into your head that should have probably come into my head when I was doing the interview in the first place.

SPEAKER_01

So even when you decided to train to become a teacher, like and you know, I try and be really transparent with the pay so people can be aware of in a studio environment. I again I have a module in our teacher training around this is what you could expect to get paid in a studio, this is if you go out on your own, these are the pros and cons of the different approaches. But I've seen that happen where I mean we I thought recently, what industry is there where when I opened my studio 10 years ago, the going rate is pretty much still the going rate 10 years on in the studios. We have always prided ourselves in trying to pay what we do pay the most in the city. We recently put up our membership prices only by a few pounds per membership. But we sent the comms out to be like, this is not for us, this is for the teachers because I have to give them a pay rise. And we haven't done that in you know in a few years. And I think even for studio owners, it's to understand that. But it is hard, isn't it? Because you go in, and I guess there's a bit of a pay scale set by the studio. But I suppose your point is have that conversation up front. So when you make an agreement, you know what that is. Because also as a studio owner, you get the people who two months down the line, it's often people who are maybe doing a bit of teaching alongside their their real job, inverted commas, and they're doing it because they think it's gonna be well, I love teaching, I want to give back, but it's still a job, and they've got to make sure that the time isn't gonna burn them out, like suddenly giving up their Sunday evening isn't gonna burn them out, but also financially that it's worthwhile. And similarly, for those people looking to maybe do a complete career change to understand that and have that conversation, and it goes back, I mean it, you know, it really does go back to being a female-driven industry. Women in all the industries are paid less because they don't ask. Because to your point, I was always taught work hard and you'll do well. Oh my god, not work hard and show what you're doing and tell what you need and and ask for the money. Like that, I that's not how women mostly were taught.

SPEAKER_00

No, and you had you the idea of asking for more money was wild, and you were thinking it's like when you're when you're renting a house and you're so scared of your landlord, instead of saying, Oh my god, there's there's mold in this house, you're like, please don't kick me out, you know. So, for me, I've always been interested in having multiple revenue streams. So for me, even when I worked for studios, I always had an alternative revenue stream, and for me, it was always corporate. So I had my eye because corporate is yes, it's a lot of work in corporate, but it's a different energy. You're coming in, you're doing your task, and then they're like, Thank you so much, and then you know you've you've done what you needed to do, but there is a kind of separation from it, which I kind of loved. Whereas the studio, you're all in, you know, you're it's you're every week, it's different. So for me, I was like, when I felt myself burning out the first time, because as I said, you can burn out multiple times in your lifetime, and you're still just learning and learning. But I remember when I was doing Pilates, I was like, okay, what I make I have this cycle at the moment. Um, because I didn't think I was enough, and I had to be doing another one and another one and spending all my money on this stuff. That I had multiple revenue streams, so I worked for the on Post the Postal Service and I worked as their corporate wellness manager, which I loved. So I would do that in the evenings, uh, three days a week, which I felt was helpful. That created a little bit of separation. What I find very interesting, I bring this up all the time in my teacher training and sound healing. I'm like, even though you're switching careers, unless I don't think there's anybody that's come through my training, that's that's this is the first thing they're doing, they've come from other backgrounds. So, like Paula works for Google, you know, uh Siffon's a teacher, it's all these different things, they're all coming from different backgrounds, and there's this thing of like, this was me then and this is me now. So, this is my new identity, I'm not the old person. When I clicked that the skills that I had made from being a quantity surveyor could be transferred into what I'm doing now, I was like, oh whoa, there's something to this. So I was like, Well, I'm actually good at budgets and I'm good at uh programming because that's what I did. Then hello, working for Unpost and working with their corporate wellness made a lot of sense because I was like programming for them. So I was like, I could merge my skill set. If you've come from an admin role, maybe you've been an office manager or something like that. When you're going for your interview at the studio, be like, I'm just inquiring, is there maybe five hours a week where I could do some maybe admin work? Everybody's happy there. I have experience instead of you hiring someone externally, I understand how the business works. Also, if you're working in social media for yourself, I often hear from places and I work for Google myself for years, um, working on their online app MOTIS, which is for wellness. And they would often say, Audrey, would you mind creating some content, you know, when you're finished today? And I was like, Oh, that's like within my work, that's not within my work hours. But instead of being like, I want you to pay me for this time, I would be like, Okay, how can we make this work? Can I create content? Can you share it on your thing? Maybe put in some of your ads, like, how can we make this work together, as opposed to feeling like I'm being exhausted here. And we actually made it work lows. And it actually, by me asking that question, I shot a commercial with Google in London. So if you do not ask, you do not receive, the worst somebody's gonna say is no. There's other ways where you can make alternative income revenue streams so that you don't have that dreditude of, oh, I'm not earning enough because for me, I could teach so many hours a week, but it's not sustainable in the long term. I need other ways so I can sleep at night because it's important.

SPEAKER_01

And I think where work like that can give you a little bit of stability as well is really good. And I certainly I knew that I could never be like a full time teacher, and that's all I did because I came from a marketing world. I actually like the running of the business, I like that. I love teaching too, but I like having that balance. So that absolutely makes sense. I was actually listening to someone on the radio the other day and they were talking about I think the average now is that people have two or three jobs, and that's becoming quite the norm to have these different things. I wonder what your thoughts are, Audrey, on teachers working at multiple studios versus one or less studios. Because I hear new teachers coming out getting very different guidance on this. I think there is definitely something great about going to different studios, testing them out, getting a sense. But you forget the travel time eats into your hourly rate. So if you add that in, your hourly rate is a lot less than doing a decent chunk of hours with one studio, even if you're at another studio another day, but doing that. I wonder what your thoughts are, because I hear some students being told work for as many studios as possible. And I'm not sure that's always the best idea.

SPEAKER_00

Ah yeah, that's an interesting question. I have, because again, it's just the way I am. I like routine, I like structure, I like to know where I am, what time. I do not like trains, buses, parkings is the most stressful part of my day, to be honest. Like I often say as a sound heater, the it's just a setup getting there, parking, really like getting my bulls out of the car is probably the one of the things most, it's not actually my job. So for me, I try to keep that to a minimum. And instead, I stay to one studio. I used I've always yeah, I think I've always over the years always had one studio, but corporate that's different because obviously uh financially it was different. So I've always had a few corporates uh going at the one time, so even I work for a studio, I would have always stayed at the one studio, but I would have had a corporate client on Thursday or Fridays. So that was I was always street about it so I felt that kept me in the straight and narrow. So no, I I actually always stayed. I felt it was easier to get to know my clients to build that community. I liked watching, I like watching progress, I like watching my client list build up, I like seeing the same people all the time. That's just kind of the person I am. I know people are like the variety is a spice of life. For me, I like uh stability and safety and building relationships with the people I was working with. I liked having work friends all because I can find the Plotties where it's a little bit lonely sometimes. So I liked having like, you know, hey guys, you know, going for coffee after my private so somebody that's the things I was missing out on. If I I feel if I was working in multiple places, I wouldn't be able to kind of harness and not the word home those friendships, I suppose. And so from that's just my opinion. It's not everybody's because everybody's built different, and maybe if you're someone like a Gemini who's like an air sign who is like a little butterfly, maybe it would suit you maybe better. And some people, but I always am that kind of person. I trust my gut now. If I'm working somewhere and it doesn't feel right, I listen to that, and I don't just leap and run out and be like, I I give, I figure it out and get a plan going if that makes sense.

SPEAKER_01

But I love your point around diversifying it, you know, your income and thinking about working, you know, doing some corporate, but even within the studios, one thing that always surprises me is that in the yoga world, they have workshops for everything. And I think in the Pilates world, when I I mean 10 years I've been running studios, nearly 11 years now running studios, really hard to get the teachers to create a workshop because I think there's this feeling that when we go to workshops, we'll be often by these amazing educators, and therefore that's what needs to be created as opposed to just a workshop experience for clients to go a bit deeper on a topic. And I wonder if that comes down to someone's belief in themselves. I'm just thinking of that as you're talking.

SPEAKER_00

100%. Um, and I'll even use myself in this example. Um, I've always been into astrology, I've always been in team of design. I I like woo-woo and I do find woo-woo's a little bit sciencey as well. So, you know, I'll always stand by that. So, but I always felt before I'm a Pilates instructor, I'm a clinical Pilates instructor, a pole star. I cannot talk about astrology or woo-woo because people will not take me seriously because I wasn't taking myself seriously, because I was projecting that onto myself. You can't read people's minds or what they like or what they think about you. The only person you can read the mind of is yourself. So your messaging is really important, and you can be a multi-hyphenate in what you're doing. Whereas there's often thing of I have to stay in my lane, I can't get ahead of myself. I have to hold on really tight to what I have because if I make the wrong move, then I'll be out of there. Because I feel like women, and I know I'm sure there's guys or everybody's listening to this podcast, but often we are kind of told we have a sell by date. God, you're gonna still be teaching platters in your 60s. People said to me before, I'm like, Yeah, I like, yeah, of course I can. Like, hello, you know, your aesthetics, you're gonna be getting older now, you're gonna be more tired, all these things. So you hold on to what you think you have. That messaging is it thank God it's disappearing bit by bit. I hope it is, but you can understand that you can constantly evolve, you can all be different, you can be different things in everything. Like a big part of my job at the moment, which I absolutely love. I'm writing loads, I'm writing editorial pieces, which I'm like, oh, this is amazing. Get paid to do this thing, as which is linked to what I'm already doing. Like, this is just an example, and I don't even know if it makes sense, but I found it interesting when I worked for Google and I worked on their wellness app MOTIS. There was a guy one time who was doing like well fitness classes on the online platform, and then one day we were all like passing out ideas. I was like, I would love to do a manifestation workshop. They were like, We'll put it out there, it was full, it went really well. Then one of the guys was like, I actually used to be a chef years ago. Um, this is wild. And he was saying, I love cooking, but I've kind of fallen out of love for cooking. But I love my animals and my dogs, and I think people would love to know how to make their own pet food at home that's like cooked from scratch. And he was like, If I could use the equipment here and film something, would that be okay? It was one of the most popular videos they've ever had. They made money from it. I was like, think outside the box, think about your skills. You could be in a studio, in a Pilates studio, you could have a sound bath in a Pilates studio. You could be doing a manifestation workshop. I could go to your studio and do a work a workshop on the moon cycles. You know, how can you use a space where you're not doing the same thing all the time? As you said, picking on something that you really like, I would love, love to know more about, like neck pain. Do a workshop on a Sunday on this.

SPEAKER_01

And of course, that's getting our clients brought into the ethos of this work, actually, because the exercise part was one part of Pilates, and all these things that you're talking about, like enriching somebody's life, opening them up, getting them to explore different things, I think is such a powerful thing to share. And in return, it can refill your cup, whether that's financially or energetically. And I feel like from chatting to you for nearly an hour, Audrey, it's about getting to know yourself and then making decisions from there. Would I be right?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, and knowing that yeah, it's okay to change your mind and it's okay to evolve. Like at the moment, you know, when I went into Pilates, I did my start, I did my Polestar, I've loved it. I loved Polestar Pilates, and I loved my work. And then as I started moving into energy work, this came with this massive amount of guilt when I decided that I wanted to really move into energy work. A, are people gonna take me seriously? Are they gonna think I'm flaky? Oh well, I've been quite like good and humble, and now I'm changing and I'm leaving, I'm le I feel like I was leaving people, which is not true. There was plenty of other instructors in Dublin who are amazing that they were gonna be in the hands of. So it's not like I'm letting people I never wanted to let people down or disappoint people, and that came from like just conditioning. Whereas now I'm like, oh, I'm allowed to change my mind, I'm allowed evolve. If I decide to do Pilates again in a couple of years, I can do that. I'm allowed to move into energy work, I'm allowed to talk about astrology. If you're a teacher and you're fascinated by movement and the sling systems, talk about it. But if you're also fascinated about human behavior, talk about it. If you're fascinated by anthropology or the real house lives of Salt Lake City, bring it into your classes. If you love music, let people know, they'll talk to you about it. Like I've had the best conversations about playlists with people because we're all human beings having a human experience and we're all multidimensional. The people that come to your class are not just like an insurance broker or a hair salon owner, they're people with real feelings and real things going on. And just like you and me, when you can see yourselves and them and them and you, then you have this massive connection. So don't put yourself in a box. Don't yeah.

SPEAKER_01

When I look at you and your work, I see you doing, you know, now doing, you know, sound baths at amazing events with brands that you could only dream of, being asked to be in, you know, commercials for activeware, working with the likes of Google, getting things like that. And we talked a little bit about this on your episode. And I know at the beginning it's like this work didn't come to you, you know, you were flyering around your area and you shared that. But now, how do you get that work, Audrey? Is it down to reputation and the fact that you're putting content out online, or is there still a little bit of putting yourself out there and asking for it?

SPEAKER_00

I would honestly say, and I know this is not the answer that people are like, oh my god, I would say I get like 10% of my work from Instagram. Um like my how I'm a micro, so I've I haven't a whopper following or anything. So I say 10% is Instagram, and that's why I am very strict about how much time I spend creating on Instagram. So like yesterday I was talking about tourist season because it's such an important time. So I just did a 10. I can't, I just don't, I'm I'm I just don't have the capacity to do a cute video that's curated. It takes me longer. Like I have one of my best friends is amazing at content creation. What would take me 20 minutes would take her a second? So I know I'm just I know my skills. So instead, for me, it's talk to camera. So I just talked about the what's happening this tourist season, what are the three things to be doing? I did it, add my captions. That's how I go. So that's so that's the amount of time I'm doing that. I'm spending on that. So where I'm getting my leads from, and it's really interesting you said that is from asking, no, and I used to do that all the time. I was pushing, forcing myself into space I didn't belong. I would even, and please again, don't put this in the clip. But like if I saw Varley online, I would be like, Oh, that's such a cool legging, would love to be involved in your stuff. The social media manager of Varley is not going, this girl is so amazing. I'm gonna ask her, like these things don't work, you know. For me, it's the relationships I have and maintaining relationships, not because I have to or I can get something out of them, but because we work together and it makes sense. So I had um a really beautiful um event with LMS last week. I just got a phone call out of the blue from the girl who does um PR for that space. She's a really good friend of mine. I've known her for years. She was like, Can you do this? I've worked there before. It's that relationship, it's that trust, that appreciation. Yes, I will get emails um on my website quite a lot because somebody is an event, maybe in a corporate, they've Googled Audrey O'Connor Sound Healing, and I've come up, I spend a lot of time in my SEO. I do it myself. SEO is important. I used to pay a lot of money for that, now I just do it myself. Just making sure I'm still coming up on those Google searches and I will get a lot of work from that and consistency. And consistency doesn't mean like I can go on holidays for a week and not show up. I can do that, like nothing's gonna happen. But just consistently letting know people I'm here, I'm still doing things, and as I said, like the main thing here is relationships. And even I actually had a photographer working on an event uh a couple of weeks ago. I'm sure he's I'm sure he's not listening to applaud his podcast, but if he is, I'll say hey to him. He did something really interesting, and he did it in a really grounded way. So we were both contractors for the job, and I was working for a hotel, and when we finished, I was like, Oh, that was amazing, thank you so much. And he just said at the end, oh hey guys, if you ever are doing anything like this again, I love wellness and I've actually got like a really good portfolio of people I've worked to before. Here's my card. I was like, Oh, people still using cards, this is amazing. Here's my card, and uh she'll shoot me an email, and uh you never know. Uh, we'd love to work together. He was honest, he showed his interest, he wasn't porcing, he wasn't pushing, he values his work, he knows he's good at it, and he made it known. He wasn't like um, oh sorry to disturb you. I really enjoyed that today, and I'd love an opportunity and anything at all. He wasn't like that, he was like straight up and I watched remotion and I talked to that hotel uh about three weeks later, and he's gotten two jobs from that.

SPEAKER_01

And I was like, And I I really appreciate you sharing that because it goes back to what we said earlier on in our conversation where we can feel like we're failing because we're not getting these opportunities, and then how do we get those opportunities? And I it's true, and I think it's tricky, right? The answer is it's tricky because I think it is about building relationships. I think there's an element of time from what you're saying, there's an element of serendipity. Sometimes you know someone who knows someone, who gets you into something, you do a good job, you build the relationship, and then off it kind of goes. But it is also about having the intention there, like the fact that you're making sure your SEO links to that kind of work and you're putting yourself out there. And that example of that photography is really good about you can put yourself forward, but just do it in a quite a powerful, not too much of a hustle way, but also not too, oh, if it doesn't, you know, if it's if it's not too much effort. Because I think this is something that, well, I know I find hard. I find it really hard. It's you know, how do you put yourself forward in the right way and be in the right place without knocking on the doors of someone who's like, Who the hell are you? I'm not gonna work with you. So I thanks for sharing that.

SPEAKER_00

Because you can put people on a pedestal. I didn't have when my self-worth was low, uh like low, not lower, low, I would be like, Oh, instead of me saying we could actually really work together and make something amazing, I would be like, Oh, I hope they choose me. And that's the energetics of it all. And you really have to do the mindset work. I'm obsessed with mindset work. Your brain works on the information you feed it, and then it can validate it. So every day I say, every single day of my life, and when I wake up, I find a sun in the sky somewhere, I'm going for my walk, and I just say, Universe, show me how good life's gonna be. Universe, show me how blessed I am today. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I trust every day. I'm not going to every day going, oh, the road's only pulled from under. I'm like, I trust, and if this isn't for me, it wasn't for me. I have to trust that. If something doesn't work out at the last minute, yes, I can be disappointed and give space to myself and go, thank you, universe. Thank you for putting me in the right direction.

SPEAKER_01

And often you look back on those negative, difficult times and you can look back and see if that hadn't happened, this other amazing thing wouldn't have happened. And I love that you, you know, one of the cruelties of life, I always think, is when your self-worth is low and you so desperately need someone to say, you look fabulous, or here's an amazing opportunity. It never happens, it happens when you have rebuilt your self-worth and you're feeling good about yourself. I always think it's so interesting. People are like, you look great, or do you want to come and do this? It's just one of those quite cruel things of life, I think. And it kind of goes back to the conversation that we've had today. Audrey, we could literally talk all day about this. For anyone listening, if you're a Pilates teacher and you're overwhelmed right now, what's the one thing you'd like them to hear from our conversation today?

SPEAKER_00

I would love you to A start small. There's you don't need to be fixed. I know people say all the time, you know, you don't need to, you don't. You need to do an imagery of your house and your own environment. Tidy up your space, organize yourself, spend an hour looking at your finances. Look at everything on a big picture. Where am I spending my hours? Where are my ingoings, my outgoings, my expenditures? Look at this very carefully. And if you can't and you find it really hard, ask someone you know for advice. There's always somebody that has a financial head in them if you don't actually have that. If you are completely lost and you can't afford a therapist, get a mentor. I went to my friend's brother six years ago, I'd say now, and I said, Can I borrow you for an hour a month? And he was like, Yeah, and I said, What do you want in return? I know him well, so he was like, You're grand, but I could have given him a body session return. I could have given him an hour of uh sound healing, I could have done something like that. You can do that, think out of the box. There is a local enterprise office in Ireland, uh Leo, they're called in Dublin. I don't know what they're in Bristol or in the UK, but there's always a local enterprise office. I applied to them years ago and I asked them, Could I have a mentor? They gave me a lady, she gave me some really good advice. I did a start your own business course, things like that help me kind of think get out of the stuckness and the overwhelm and get into your body. I know the Net West Bank actually in the UK does a similar program here. So good. Get into your body. Somatics, slow down when you slow down and you're doing your lymphatic drainage. For me, it's lymphatic drainage, just dry brushing. They're the moments when I'm getting out of my head and into my body, is really important. Connect with your why and then also connect with your identity. Why are these things coming up? Ask the questions, they're uncomfortable. Look, check in with yourself. Is this a pattern? I work with patterns all the time. Why is this pattern showing up again? How can I retrain the neuroplasticity of my brain to create new pathways? So for me, I used to always say years ago, I'm such a worrier, I'm such a worrier, I'm not a worrier. That's an identity. My brain was being fed by me. Now I'm like, you know, I'm very cautious and I am risk-averse, but I'm also uh well able. You know what I mean? It's that kind of messaging. Can you say no to things and trust that they're not for you? You can trust your intuition and go, I'm okay. Can you give a price for something without second guessing it and give that quotation and go, thank you, universe, and just send it out and go, I trust that my work will be valued and they will be delighted to pay this rate? Could you take the stress out of every time you ask for a quote and have a Canva thing made out with your prices, the hours, and that's it. So that every time somebody asks you, you're not freaking out. Uh, because that used to happen to me all the time. And can you surround yourself with people that are very good? You are they say you're the top, you're top five people, aren't they? The accumulation of your energy. So who you surround yourself with is very important. Um, people who love you, who see you, not the people that you you put on a pedestal, it's the people like around you that are really important.

SPEAKER_01

And actually, sometimes you you have to take someone out of that group who's you know, you might, as you start to understand this work, more you might go, this person is not good for me. Yeah, and that's important too, isn't it?

SPEAKER_00

Your awareness is heightened, and there is something so hard about a female friendship being broken down, sometimes even more than a romantic relationship, but less you know, and even if you are in a female, female relationship, obviously, but uh you know, that is something that is takes up so much headspace, and you feel like oh it can it's it's heart-wrenching, but you know, it has a a knock-on effect on everything else. And please, please, please check in with your body every single morning, whether that's 10 minutes of meditation, 10 minutes of putting your feet in the grass, 10 minutes of just playing with your dog, reading a book.

SPEAKER_01

10 I like the idea. I'm gonna sit in my garden, have my cup of tea with my feet on the grass and a blanket around me. I can still watch the kids from there. This feels doable. I'm like, I'm gonna take that from today's conversation as my first little tip. I love that idea. Audrey, this has been so enriching. Obviously, you've got your sound healing membership, which we'll put links to. I love it. I love the fact that we can come online live and do a full hour, pull some tarot cards, you'll talk about the moon, all that kind of stuff. I also love 10 minutes I can't get back to sleep. I've got anxiety today, you know, all the things. It's been so powerful for me. How else can people work with you?

SPEAKER_00

Thank you for asking. I would say you just do your 10-minute meditation every day for the rest of your life. And I would say you can find me on Instagram on Audrey O'Connor underscore underscore underscore underscore because there's five of us here. And you can do like a 10-minute meditation with me every day. Um, that's on there. Um, and you can also like I'll give updates on like the astrology, just tips about what I do. I talk about like the stuff that people don't like to talk about, financial stuff sometimes as well. I think it's quite important. Sometimes beauty products, I like your recommendations of beauty products. I'm like, oh that's that sounds good. I could talk about Katie Jane Hughes all day long and makeup. I love my makeup, and I used to hide that all the time. I used to think people would think I was like superficial if I talked about makeup, and I love it because we're all interested in these kind of things. I also have a TAS scientific teacher training which is coming up in January. So I've just finished up with my last crew. So we had Paula that came in from Puerto Rico, I had people from Ireland, everywhere. It's amazing, and we cover the theory of music, sound, energy, business, and also next week I am launching a YouTube series called Blame the Moon, which is really exciting because I love YouTube. Um, so I'll have like a YouTube video on when I'm having my dinner. I've always loved YouTube, I think maybe because I I I like long form like that as well. Love a podcast, love YouTube. So it's gonna be all around understanding the moon cycles.

SPEAKER_01

Why you might feel we'll add the links on because when this goes live, that will be live. So we'll add the links onto your channel because it'd be great. That's what I'm gonna do that for. See, this is all stuff we can fit in while we're doing other things.

SPEAKER_00

Yes, definitely. Anything else? I'm trying to think. Oh, my moon site. Sorry, my my every month I have a virtual online gathering, they're amazing. It's probably my happiest time of the month. Um, it's usually on a Wednesday, so I have one on Wednesday coming up now, and that. Will be for the the next full moon. So that's so they're always on a full moon every month. And we gather, we breathe, we do, we obviously do Reiki. I infuse it with Reiki, we do a sound bath, and then we do a tarot pull at the end. And it's just a real beautiful community gathering. And by the time the end of end of it, most people are asleep. So they just float off to bed.

SPEAKER_01

And I absolutely love it. I absolutely love them. They are such a nice thing. It's nice, also, it's great to have the accessibility of online, but there's something really lovely about an event. Like it's live and I make time for myself. And even if I haven't done all the things I'm supposed to do in the day, I'm like once a month, I know I'll do that.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, 100%. And I just love the gang. I feel like everybody's quite open there as well, you know. It's and everybody just says because it's like a sacred container. So people are like, I'm actually really tired today. Or I don't know. Sometimes you see Avi teaching and are with the balls, and you'll see somebody like just lying down, and you see their husband come in with the baby, and I'm like, no, no, let her, let her go, let her let her do her meditation. So yeah, it's for it's very accessible. And like I even see like some of the gang of their candles, their sage, you're like, oh, it's beautiful, it's really, really beautiful.

SPEAKER_01

Well, thank you for your time, and I hope that has given our listeners a few tips on how to prevent and heal from burnout. So thank you, Audrey.

SPEAKER_00

It has been a joy, and thank you so much for having me back on. I was so excited. So thank you, thank you, thank you, Nick.